Hello again!
Let me first start off by apologizing for my absence here. I've been busy enjoying this roller coaster ride called life but I have not forgotten about you! I love blogging and have been working on several things, but I'm just not ready to share them yet. Summer is halfway over and before I know it I will be returning back to school to start my 7th....yes 7th year of teaching! My first group of kiddos will be 8th graders this year and that blows my mind! Joe and I are enjoying our time together and are soaking up every little bit of summer that's left! So here's what I have for you today:
Can I just begin by saying "thank you?" Of course I can, this is my blog so I can do what I want :) I want to say thank you to all of you who are continually praying for our sweet little family, for those that reach out for a hug just when I need it most, and for those that continue to spread our story around. God is working on our book right now and each of you are part of the pages He is writing and I couldn't be more thankful!
Last summer I wrote about the season of waiting I was experiencing which included tests, blood draws, ultrasounds, and far too many single pink lines and late night cries then I can count. My heart was hurting and I was beginning to doubt if I was going to be a mom at all.
For those of you that are reading this that are at that point in your journey...where you just can't seem to find the joy in daily life, I see you. I may not know you, but our God knows you and He hears you, even if it feels like He doesn't.
While my waiting is a little different one year later, it hasn't gotten any easier. I am still waiting to hold my precious baby in my arms, waiting to make a midnight bottle, waiting to rush into his/her room in the wee hours of the morning to console a cry, waiting to be called "mama."
I would be lying if I told you that this was easy, that I was doing okay, that I didn't cry at least once a week as I long to find answers, that adoption and our sweet baby wasn't on my mind each and every minute of every day.
I would be lying if I told you that I haven't considered taking out a second mortgage on our home or selling everything inside it to sign on with a larger agency so we could hold our baby faster.
I would be lying if I told you that I didn't spend time in our nursery each day, dreaming about what it will be like when laughter and cries finally fill the room.
But just like God always does, He has reminded me of the incredible beauty that comes when we wait on His timing.
My "type A" personality doesn't lend itself easily to a waiting period in which I am not in control. I've said it before and I've said it again, it's no coincidence that God is making me, Miss Plan Everything, wait for His timing.
I'm learning exactly what it means to surrender your mind, body, and spirit to the Lord. God is teaching me how to rely on Him as I navigate through this roller coaster adoption ride.
Each morning I look forward to meeting Him on my couch as I begin my quiet time and each morning it's as if He knew exactly what I needed to hear. He's showing me each and every day that His plan, not mine, is greater than anything I could imagine.
I'm training for a half marathon because running is something that I've never enjoyed (sounds like a perfect reason to begin running for "fun", huh?) and I wanted to challenge myself. Running has become such an amazing gift not only for my body but for my spirit as well, as I'm seeing what I can do when I trust the body that God has given me.
As we wait, I'm seeing just how wonderful life can be when we trust the One who has given it to us.
So today, whether you are waiting on a baby, on a marriage, on a job, a house, an answer, or whatever God has laid on your heart, I encourage you to see what happens when you stop and enjoy the life that He has given you. God has placed us in our exact situation for a very specific purpose. The Man who has placed the stars in the very sky above us has hand picked us to be exactly where we are at this exact moment. The very One who was crucified and resurrected 3 days later knows us by name and knows exactly where we are going and when.
So, while it may be the hardest thing you or I has ever done, trust in Him. Is it easy? Absolutely not! Will God answer your prayers or give you what you want right here, right now? My guess is no, but my hope is that you too will see beauty in the wait.
Side note: I've never heard this song before, but is began playing on my Pandora as I finished this post today. See...He's got this!
No comments:
Post a Comment