On August 30, Joe and I were asked to share about the Shield of Faith and how we used it to help us along our adoption road. Little did we know that we would be in South Carolina during that sermon. I felt that God wanted me to share this with our church family, even when we weren't there. So many raw emotions.
This week Pastor Kevin asked us to share about how the Shield of Faith has shaped our journey to meet our son.
It's ironic that God blessed us with Colton on Friday morning and that we are with him today instead of being with you all. There was a plan, you know? Induction Tuesday...time to prepare at home...yeah God works that way sometimes.
We felt that God still wanted us to share our story and how the Shield of Faith brought us to this very moment.
Ephesians 6:16 says:In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one.
God asks us to have faith and carry it with us at all times, because without it we are susceptible to doubt, deception, and defeat.
Over the past two and a half years we have experienced all of the above as we prayed night after night, day after day, and month after month that God would bless us with a child of our own. Each night we would pray that he would equip us with the tools necessary to raise a God-fearing child that would follow His lead all the days of their life. Not a day went by that we didn't pray for our child. But every month that went by, those flaming arrows of the devil kept hitting us and we became doubtful and felt defeated.
But God kept telling us, "Be still." So we tried. (And often failed)
After many defeating moments and failed tests, we prayed that God would lead us to adoption if that was His plan for our family and on Thanksgiving Day 2014, God literally gave us the sign we were looking for. We knew that adoption was a road that was going to be tough and it wasn't going to be short but we knew that this is what God intended for our family.
So we created our book that future birth parents would look at and we prayed over it. We prayed for the mother who would selflessly look at this book and the baby that she was carrying. We prayed that the baby would be healthy and happy, even if she didn't choose us. Each morning we would pray over our baby's crib that God would protect him and would bring him (or her) to us when the time was right. I (Tara) searched night and day for a birth family, because that's what everyone tells you to do. I gave myself anxiety because nothing was turning up and the doubt crept in again.
But God said "Be still. I've got this."
Meanwhile in South Carolina a mom was preparing her 3 children for a day at school when she began to feel sick. A doctors appointment a week later would confirm...she was pregnant and unsure of her future. She was alone in this world, just her and her kids and she knew that this baby needed a better life.
So, despite many who told her to do the opposite, she chose to make a call to an adoption agency instead.
She was quickly given over 25 profiles of adoptive families to look at. Before each one she would pray "God if this is the family, show me." And after each one He kept saying "I've got something better." She went through all 25 profiles and found nobody she liked. Soon she would go to the doctor to find out her son has a congenital heart defect. She felt more alone than ever.
But God said "Be still. I've got this."
So she waited. She struggled, but she waited. She talked to God each night and she felt God tell her, "this is a special baby. I've got big things in store for him." But she felt defeated because she knew she couldn't provide him with what he needed. So she prayed every night.
The following week she received a call that an adoptive family was interested. She told herself "if this isn't the family, I'm going to have to try to raise him but I know this isn't what you want Lord."
But God said "Be still. Have faith. I've got this."
So she agreed to look at the profile. The last profile she would look at. July 6th was the day.
I remember the day like it was yesterday. I remember waking up thinking "Lord this is our yes, if it's yours too, then let it be. If it isn't meant to be, please soften my heart for this blow."
On July 6th, 2015 our profile was shown for the first and last time. She said the minute she opened our book that she knew we were the ones.
Today I had the opportunity to sit down and talk with *** about her life and her family and learned of the awful things she has gone through during her life. But she told me "I may not be a church girl but God and I are close. He knows me and I know him. I know it's all led to this."
She told me that she felt God continue to tell her "have faith, trust me." So she did. Her exact words today were "God chose Mary to carry his most precious gift in the world. But Mary had to give Jesus to the world because the world needed him. I feel like God chose me to carry one of my most precious gifts and he needs me to give him to you so that you can help him be all that he should be in this world. And I know it's going to be okay because God told me so."
The Shield of Faith helps to protect us from the flaming arrows of the evil one. We pray that our children will grow up with their armor in tact and that it will be strong. We pray that we, as parents, will help them polish that armor and make it solid. But we also pray that their lives will be committed to God. Colton's and all of our children's lives, whether here or just a thought, have already been planned. Their paths are laid out for them by the One who put the stars in the sky. How amazingly awesome is that? He knows the (curly) hairs on their head and the freckles on their noses. We just need the faith to trust their lives to him.
I've never been more sure of anything in my life. God has orchestrated this adoption from start to finish and he's got more in store for us. Tonight I hugged the woman who gave my child life and she hugged the one who will help him live it.
Tomorrow (today for all of you) is the day she will leave the hospital without him. And although she knows this is Gods plan, it doesn't make it easier. So will you all please lift her up today, that she will have the Shield of Faith to trust his life to us?
Joe and I are in love beyond words. I hope you all enjoy his beautiful cheeks and full head of hair like we do. He's truly a gift from God.
Oh and cyndy...2015 girl!!!!!!
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